Also, I Would Have Accepted Snakes*

So, did everyone have a chance to get their comments in? Hmm? Everyone?

(See, how I cleverly pretended I was waiting on you when in actuality you've been waiting on me? I know. How sneaky. Do you ever do that to your husband? Come downstairs where he's been passing the time waiting for you by watching TV, and sigh all annoyed and ask "Well, are we going to go or what?"? ...No? Yeah, me neither. That would be mean.)

Moving on. How to get the little people into their very own little beds.

When it came to deciding where Savannah would sleep, it appeared to be an easy decision.

All it took was ONE co-worker telling Chris that his 7-year-old still slept in their marital bed and a comment on the "ix-nay on the ex-say ever since" to send Chris into a panic. I seem to recall that he came racing in the door from work breathless and wild-eyed panting out the words "The...baby...has...to...sleep...in...its...own...room". Then he collapsed on the floor in a pool of his own tears wailing "I knew this wasn't a good idea!".

Or something very similar. I'm not kidding.

Chris is extremely easy-going and my pregnancy was no exception. But, co-sleeping was literally the one thing on which he had a very strong opinion.

If you think I'm overstating his conviction, this should bring you around.

Chris slept in a chair with Savannah propped on his chest for four months because it was the only way she would sleep for more than an hour at a time outside of our bed. As a matter of fact, they would probably still be sleeping like that were it not for the fact that Chris started to have trouble breathing after she hit 20 pounds.**

So, the traditional methods we did not use, I admit.

Once it came time for Savannah to transition from her daddy's chest to a big spacious crib in her own room all alone in the dark, you can imagine how that went. Which goes to show you, if we can do it, you can do it.

When it was apparent that it was time to transition her, I read all the books on all the methods. Then I selected aspects of each that seemed to fit our family (translation: that seemed least likely to make me cry).

Here's what we did in order. You will see that it was not a direct line.

1. First Week: I started putting Savannah in her crib to play during the afternoons. That way she could get familiar with it in the daylight.
2. Second Week: I started putting her down for naps in her crib. Up until this point, she was taking her naps in the living room with me, which was making Oprah tons of fun to watch muted. Not.
3. Third Week: We started to backslide. She became clingy and not too happy about her crib. I had to rock her to sleep.
4. Fourth Week: She started to scream if we walked past her room and clawed at my neck if I went near her crib. This is when I began rocking her in front of running water for up to an hour to get her to sleep. Even more fun than muted Oprah.
5. Fifth Week: I started putting her in her crib when she was tired, but FOR THE LOVE OF GOD NOT OVERTIRED, and I would sit in the chair next to her crib while she cried and reached out for me. I wouldn't look at her and would stare at the floor (I would not recommend this). I would lay her back down every time she stood up, which would make her angrier than a jar of bees (I don't recommend this either). This was an all around awesome time. I think this was the week I locked myself in my closet and screamed "SHUT THE F*CK UP!" into a pillow. I have tears in my eyes remembering this time. It seemed like a year.
6. Sixth Week: I would lay her in her crib and come in and out of the room, cooing to her and talking softly while staying busy and out of arm's reach. This sort of created the illusion that I was just...about...to...pick...her...up...any...minnnn...zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz. Off she would go for a three hour power nap. Victory!
7. Seventh Week: Evenings. Yeah. NOT. HAVING. IT. There was jumping and crying and chanting "MAMA MAMA MAMA MAMA". I tried the same trick that worked with daytime naps - going in and out of the room. Except this time, since it was dark, I would sometimes sit in the chair in her room. I would sit in it on and off, coming in and out of her room, acting busy. She would cry and reach out to me, but it was less intense every night. And every night -THIS IS THE KEY- I would MOVE the chair toward the door. By the end of the week, the chair was in the hallway and I was hardly sitting in it. She was crying less and was less expectant, but was ultimately still crying herself to sleep. Until...
8. Eighth Week: I bought one of these. The best twenty bucks I ever done spent. She would konk out despite herself, her will no match for The Whale Songs.

I admit defeat.

Now, five years later, I only wish I could get her to get up in the morning.

I don't know if this helps you, I know that every kid is different, but it is a testament to the fact that it can be done. I would also recommend skipping right to #8. And kicking off the night with a stiff drink.

I'll post the next topic Wednesday! (I swear on my Costco box of 100 Calorie Snack Packs that I will. Now you know I mean it.)

~~~~

*If you know where my title comes from, you are invited to be my best friend.

**What I'm leaving unsaid is that yes, I, a brand new mommy, was able to sleep BY MYSELF IN MY BED ALL NIGHT for the first four months with Chris only bringing her in for feedings. *ducks to avoid your swing*

Comments

[robyn]

Well, we co-slept. :) Despite our newborn sleeping in bed with us, I still managed to get pregnant not three months later.

FYI: There are other places to have sex besides the bedroom. :)

Both of my children have *always* been the absolute best sleepers. Only up for feedings, never ever a problem with falling asleep.

Now, at 3 1/2 and 4 1/2, they still do beautifully.

I have very strong feelings on the "cry it out" method, so that was never an option for us. While co-sleeping is certainly not for every family, it was definitely the best decision for us.

[robyn]

Oh, and I think I remember that quote on The Office. :)

[Lena]

"There are other places to have sex besides the bedroom".

Every co-sleeping parent tells me this. I am dense. I don't get it. It sounds ...awkward.

[Type (little) a]

Question: what is Michael Scott's greatest fear?

Loneliness, maybe women

Wrong, Michael Scott is not afraid of anything. Also, I would have accepted snakes.

[B]

the office. Michael's fears.

so tired from teething baby. post made me cry. why,yes, i am nursing while typing. i do so love you.

[Jessica]

I tried # 8 first when I was "crib training" my daughter. I just slowly moved the chair toward the door. I sang to her and talked to her. She didn't cry much but it took 2 hours most nights. My second daughter loves her bed. She loved her crib and not she has one of those small transition beds. She loves it too. Sometimes she just sits in it to play or rest. It's funny.

[Butrfly Garden]

#8 is, from what I hear, one of the best ways to deal with these situtations.

I hear that all the time, too, about "doing it" other places. To me, my bedroom is mine to do what I please in and the rest of the house is for the family - not the other way around. The kids don't even go into our bedroom.

[MJ]

My DH wouldn't let me bring the babies into the bed, he was afraid we'd smush them. But my son was a nightmare to get to sleep. We did the same things you did. Sat in a chair, moved it further and further until one day, he just rolled over and FELL.ASLEEP.ALL.BY.HIMSELF. AWESOME!

[Katelynsmama]

My daughter slept with us most of the first two years. We were able to get her to sleep by herself the first few hours a night so we had our alone time when work allowed it. I went back to work two weeks after she was born head accountant for a tax firm during tax season. Not the best time to have no sleep. Good thing I was a great nurser as she spent lots of time nursing while I worked and nursing while I slept. Sometimes you just do what you have to do. Oh and the first six months of her life she would scream everytime my husband tried to put her to sleep he was only for playing with during the day. After two hours he just couldn't take it anymore and I had to take her. Thank God that's over. My daughter doesn't sleep with us anymore but she will occasionally slip in bed with me at 5am to cuddle it's great.

[Dayna]

I am trying the chair thing TONIGHT. I cannot take the lack of sleep anymore. I'll let you know how it goes!

Loved this post by the way.

[Lena]

In retrospect, my title was way too easy, no?

[Amie]

My daughter slept in her pumpkin seat until she was 4 months. It was the only way she would sleep.
We were determined to not be co-sleepers. My husband was way more concerned about the sex thing too.
I was more worried about ME getting sleep.
We transitioned to the crib by putting the pumpkin seat in the crib with her in it for 2 months and then she transitioned by 4 1/2 months to the crib.

[kirsty]

We never willingly co-slept/co-sleep (when the girls were little, I was too scared of rolling on top of them, and now, I hate being kicked in the kidneys/stomach every 20 seconds), we just put the girls in their crib right from day 1. Carla has always been a reasonably good sleeper and went to her big girl bed pretty easily (didn't work out she could get out by herself for at least 3 months!), whilst Lydie has always been a nightmare, though the transition wasn't any more of a problem. She just never wants to sleep, anywhere, ever.

[Elizabeth]

I was one of those mothers who felt guilty because my newborn daughter only wanted to sleep alone in her bassinet! If I tried to hold her when she was sleepy, she would fuss and wiggle around until I just laid her down, awake, and then she would fall asleep. I know! I actually felt guilty about what a good sleeper she was! And now she puts herself down for naps by coming up to me with her blankets in her hand asking for her bottle. Seriously, how did I get so lucky?

P.S. Lena? You're pretty :)

[DianaCLT]

Ben had terrible Night Terrors. I mean HORRIBLE. I was going in and out of his room most nights, about every 5 minutes. Not. Fun. So - we co-slept. He had far fewer night terrors when snuggled up with us. And I actually got to sleep. He slept with us for 2 1/2 years. Yes, that's right. Two and one half YEARS! How did DH and I enjoy some...ahem...*alone* time, you ask? Well...Ben has a double bed in his room. Soooo - we'd build walls of pillows on either side of him in our bed, while we enjoyed the vacant double bed in his room. Or the living room floor. Whichever had less crap strewn about. ;) Getting Ben into his own bed was actually much easier than I expected. DH or I would snuggle up for a few minutes with him in his double bed, he'd fall asleep, we'd leave.

Lilly is still in the bassinet, next to our bed. Now - she really doesn't belong there anymore. She's too big, quite honestly. Haven't moved her for a couple of reasons. 1) Emotional reason: she's my last baby, and this is the last time I will have one of my offspring in this wonderful family bassinet, which has been used by most of my family members for THREE GENERATIONS! 2) Spatial reason: we never planned on living in this house with 2 kids. We. Were. Going. To. Move. Before. Then. Oops! Yes, we have a 3 bedroom house. But the 3rd bedroom is being used as a computer room. Or should I say...computerS room...as in three. No space for Lilly in there! And, well, Ben's room is full of BEN. He's very excited that his sister will very soon share his room. But I have to de-Ben it a little. To make room for Lilly. ;)

[generic viagra]

I was a great nurser as she spent lots of time nursing while I worked and nursing while I slept. Sometimes you just do what you have to do. Oh and the first six months of her life she would scream everytime my husband tried to put her to sleep he was only for playing with during the day.

kids beds and childrens bunk beds

[Air Jordans]

Compete, only for good, only against time.

[gold buyers Oklahoma city]

Moving from crib to bed is like achieving a great success. They cry for some days but after that the routine becomes more peaceful.

[חדרי תינוקות]

This blog contains some serious stuff about the family relationship and sex between the couple, where they need to think twice before they act. I seriously recommend to have sex when their children are asleep in their own rooms rather than in ohter rooms. I congratulate 'Cheeky Lotus' for coming up with such a good family related post:)

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